On Camaraderie and Commiseration
“Thy friendship makes us fresh./And doth beget new courage in our breasts.” — 1 Henry VI, 3.3.86-87
Writing is a lonely office. Alone, mucking through the bogs of our own minds and bodies, writers can easily feel isolated, stuck in quicksand, unable to maintain forward momentum. Finding the right group of like-minded others is one of the best ways to combat this. Putting words on a page in an effort to articulate the self, the world, and the space between those two things can feel like bobbing in a tempestuous sea on the flotsam of a wreck. Finding a group of like-minded friends who are trying to do the same is like the Coast Guard showing up with blankets, warm soup, and a reassurance that you will be fine.
I have been lucky to find such rescuers. Some are constants for me, people who will always say yes if I ask them to take a look at something, no matter how busy they are. People who I have known for years, whose voices and advice I trust, people who I can work beside even in silence and feel their support. They know who they are. But the time I get to spend with those special folks is limited. Work and life and distance get in the way.
Recently I have found a new group of people to trust and to hold me accountable for producing new work. I was invited to join a group of REALLY SMART and VERY TALENTED women who meet on Zoom once or twice a week(when available - no pressure) to discuss poems, pull something from those poems to use as a prompt, write for 30 minutes, and come back to share drafts. Some of these women I knew, some I “knew” on social media, and some I had never met before. None of that mattered, though, the first time I joined the group. I immediately felt welcome and as if I was understood. And with the impetus to create something in 30 minutes, I let go of some of the concerns I usually have when drafting and just dove in. I was a little intimidated after hearing what some of these women wrote in only 30 minutes - I mean, seriously good stuff - but the format of receiving only positive feedback on what’s working results in everyone feeling like they produced something of value to return to later. Ideas bounce from writer to writer in appreciation of what the other has done. And celebrations and disappointments are also shared. It’s a network of ideas and emotions that I didn’t know I was missing until I became a part of it. And it has pushed me beyond those meetings to keep creating, drafting new work more regularly.
I have drafted more poems so far in January than I did in the three previous months, and I have more submissions out at journals than I have had for years. I know it’s not only the group that has inspired this work, but they are a part of it. My constant companions are still constants and always will be. I treasure their role in my personal and creative life. But injecting a new dose of poetry friendship into my life has, as the Shakespeare quote at the top says, made me “fresh and begat new courage in my breast.” Find yourself even one person who can do this for you, and your writing life won’t seem so solitary anymore.
Writing Prompts
Use the painting in this post (one of mine) as a visual prompt. (I have left off the title so that I don’t influence your ideas.) Consider the intersection of elements and colors, the meandering pencil line. What does it bring to mind? How could you use it as a metaphor for something else?
Write about a time when you found a person/group of people who made you feel more capable or less alone. Or write about a time when you felt isolated and misunderstood.